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Silver lining?...

By Derek Thomas :  01/07/2008 :  Comments (41) :
I want to Believe it...

Tesco's 06-07 UK turnover was £22.7 Billion, thats billion with a capital B and UK profit was 1.15 Billion. (again with the B word ). Yeah, but money won't buy you happiness will it?? No, but it will allow you to rent it for a season or 5.

The Cloud: DK goes through. The Silver Lining (Part One), for Bill and his cohorts: Tesco buy them out for mucho dinero.

The EPL is BIG, yet again with the B words, business and Tesco is in the Business business. All this would not have cost Tesco much in real terms. Because, like WHU and the Liverpool, we will probably end up paying for our own takeover in some form, plus whatever we end up forking out for the Tesco dome (tick large one for the Cloud column there).

As the only punters likely to fork out a decent sum for the naming rights, they 'agree' to 'pay us' the £15mill, or whatever... no need to trouble the accountants lads, we'll just deduct it off what you owe us.

Even our debts can / will / maybe taken over, with the right word from the right accountant ( I have resisted the B-word, beancounters) to the taxman, you can, or so I Believe (sorry) make money on a loss.... silver lining time for Tesco Tel.

5% of £1.15 billion UK profit for 3 or 4 yrs. £50 mill total. £150-200mill for transfers over 4 yrs. This will allow us to rent our happiness one year at a time. Silver Trophy time, which for us is the ultimate silver lining.

Tesco's silver lining could be ? on the back of our latest CL win ? float, the whole shooting match on the stock exchange. Headline; This day 6yrs on....' Sir Terry Leahy, recently retired Tesco CEO and new Everton Chairman, spoke today at his pleasure in seeing so many of his players involved in England's triumphant Euro 14 victory parade'.

p.s. No prize for the 1st one to write back with the word Bollocks.

Reader Comments

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Marc Williams
1   Posted 01/07/2008 at 14:07:41

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Whats the weather like today on planet LA LA !

This is a WARNING to any children or young adults on this site :
JUST SAY NO TO DRUGS especially whilst reading the Financial times or The Grocer magazine.
Gavin Ramejkis
2   Posted 01/07/2008 at 14:25:34

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What is this pish about? If Tesco wanted a football club they would have done it already and that would be down to the shareholders and not Tesco Tel - another true blue (the use of that phrase should be banned as it’s fucking meaningless in this context), if Tesco Tel wanted to buy a football club then surely he would have done already? Didn’t Tesco already say they weren’t interested in naming rights as by then they’ll have got what they need from the deal a big supermarket and thousands of residents scanning barcodes, filling shelves and pushing trolleys across the empty car park humming and rocking back and forth happy in their new careers.
Chris Fisher
3   Posted 01/07/2008 at 14:42:16

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Michael Kenrick
4   Posted 01/07/2008 at 14:46:06

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I’m glad I’m not the only one who struggles with Derek’s bizarre thoughts and manner of expression. If this was an effort to regain credibility after the last one, I think he failed...
Shaun Brennan
5   Posted 01/07/2008 at 14:33:16

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Disagree, compleatly. If Tesco were to buy a club. I honestly believe Everton would not be worth the risk. If teams like Liverpool and Man United are up for sale. Why Everton? Business comes before sentiments whether or not Terry Tesco has a blue affinity.
Neil Pearse
6   Posted 01/07/2008 at 14:56:04

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Leaving aside whether this would be good or bad, cloud or silver lining - I would not be at all surprised if Tesco and Terry Leahy played a much bigger role in Everton Football Club in the future.

Derek is not as trippy dippy as some of you guys think...
Barry Sherlock
7   Posted 01/07/2008 at 14:55:09

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Derek I read your article above - TWICE. I still didn’t understand it!
But it was worth it for the laugh - at Marc Williams’s comment coming back!!!
Rupert Sullivan
8   Posted 01/07/2008 at 14:57:31

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Derek - have you just written this as a bit of a laugh mate? What on earth makes you think that Tesco want to buy a footy club? Even were they to, what makes you think they would hand over 5% of their profit to EFC?

Last time I thought about it I considered Tesco to be a business rather than a charity - perhaps I’m wrong though.

Still, thanks for brighenting up my day!
Ciarán McGlone
9   Posted 01/07/2008 at 15:14:16

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just thought I add my tuppence...

Andy Duff
10   Posted 01/07/2008 at 16:08:41

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I can just see it now. Blue and white striped shirts with "Tesco Value" in bold (dare I say it?) red writing. The future is bright, the future is Tesco Tel. Another plus point ? we should all get a shedload of Club Card points for buying our season ticket.
Micky Norman
11   Posted 01/07/2008 at 16:17:18

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Bollocks. I’m the second one. Do I get a prize?
Micky Norman
12   Posted 01/07/2008 at 16:22:51

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And if Kirkby gets called in you will be able to hear the enormous cheer all the way to....well, Kirkby.
Joe Ludden
13   Posted 01/07/2008 at 17:44:46

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What the??
EJ Ruane
14   Posted 01/07/2008 at 17:24:32

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The future?

Well there’ll be a LOT of Mono-rails,

Cars will be a thing of the past and we’ll all travel by rocket fueled back pack,,,type-things

The lovable reds Derby will be against Marine in the Iceland Premier Conference (North).

Dropped pie-headed presenter, Adrian Chiles will be reconciled with his wife and celebrate 50 years marriage.

President Clooney will find Bin Laden (working in a Burger King in Denver).

Wyness will tell Utd fans "We ALL love Old Trafford, but a move to a 300,000 seater stadium in Plaistow is the only way to move forward".

Global warming will be solved using 4000 snow-making machines, each the size of The Isle Of Man.

The Queen will celebrate her 167th birthday.

The Spice girls daughters will form a girl-band called Spice II (like their mams, they’ll be shite)

Belgium will be renamed ’Dullsville’.

And....The 12 hour working-week will be introduced!

(well you fucking started it!)

Anthony Newell
15   Posted 01/07/2008 at 19:23:20

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If the above was spoken you’d have to call it verbal diarrohea
Dick Fearon
16   Posted 01/07/2008 at 22:55:02

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Such cases are not uncommon among my antipodean cousins. Hailing from a strange country situated to the east of Australia and resembling an upsidedown cut-in-half worn-out wellington boot plus an abundance of sheep could have something to do with it.
Bob Parrington
17   Posted 01/07/2008 at 23:37:33

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Derek, ever heard about core business activity. Tesco might want to "use" our club’s presence to help create additional sales turnover (bodies through the door) but it would be unlikely that they would want to own an EPL team.

At least you got some reaction!!
Ste Kenny
18   Posted 01/07/2008 at 23:58:10

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I have wanted to say this for a while but have held back. Tesco are the market leader in one of the most cut-throat industries imaginable. I would be delighted if Everton were to jump into bed with them. People who deride Tesco and shout the merits of Bestway (who!!!) are idiots and I dont like calling fellow Evertonians that. I dont want to move to kirby and ideally I don't want to leave GP but, as business alliances go, this is probably one of the best we could hope for.
Ciarán McGlone
19   Posted 02/07/2008 at 08:30:19

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Yes, Ste

As far as corporate despots go, it doesn’t get any bigger than tesco.

Getting into bed with the most exploitative and destructive global retail chain, is definetly something to celebrate!

In fact, I think we should dig up Mr Hitler and get him in on the sponsorship act too!
Wayne Hughes
20   Posted 02/07/2008 at 09:16:17

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Is this the same Tesco who have very publicly stated that they are not giving Everton a penny towards the cost of the ground?

You have to laugh at the desperation of the pro poodles and their pathetic attempts to spin what everyone else can see is a disaster waiting to happen.
Mike Coates
21   Posted 02/07/2008 at 09:18:20

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I like to be a positive person..

All will be well once our season resumes :)

We’re living in fear and dwelling on the negative way too much.

I think we’re all just a little bored.. lol
EJ Ruane
22   Posted 02/07/2008 at 09:28:03

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Ahhh good on you Mike Coates!

A man after my own heart!

Because like Mike, I’m a positive person.

In fact, I’ll prove it!

I’m positive Ste Kenny is talking complete bollocks.

I’m positive he’s an idiot

I’m also positive he works for Tesco.

So, come on all you negative nellies -get with me and Mike, you’ll feel better being positive!

Mark Jensen
23   Posted 02/07/2008 at 11:22:15

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What I find totally amusing is the total disrespect posters have for Tesco. Forget the stadium issue for a second and look at their accounts. Tesco are absolutely HUGE to the extent, the SKY4 would be interested if they wanted to buy them, why shouldn’t we? I would certainly welcome them investing over a boared Russian Oil barron or an American version of Waldorf and Staddler!!!
Am I missing something here?
Ste Kenny
24   Posted 02/07/2008 at 11:29:23

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I'm positive I'm not an idiot , I'm positive I don't work for Tesco and I'm positive that I couldn't give a toss what Tesco have done or who they have done it to.

I only give a toss about EFC and if I think something's good for EFC I?ll say so. I?ve voiced my opposition to the move many times in other threads, and my opionion hasn't changed.

Ask yourself this if Tesco were selling Everton kits as opposed to JJB (useless bastards) would we have sold more?

Finally I?m also a positive person and I?m positive getting involved with companies who dominate their market is positive for EFC because the current board couldn?t run a church raffle.
Ciarán McGlone
25   Posted 02/07/2008 at 11:53:02

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I?m almost certain Tesco?s balance sheet didn?t get where it was by applying humanist principles and being altruistic...

To be honest, I can?t really believe the amount of naivety that people have in regard to Tesco.

Oh, but isn?t Terry Leahy an Evertonian!

Dear God.
Neil McKinney
26   Posted 02/07/2008 at 13:38:16

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So we are comparing Tesco to Hitler now. Fucking grow up!
Chad Schofield
27   Posted 02/07/2008 at 13:15:04

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Sick as it is, I would like it if Tescos did go in for us... Though it it seems lie getting into bed with a Bond villain, Look at some of the "shining knight" suger daddies in the EPL, "Little ethics help".
EJ Ruane
28   Posted 02/07/2008 at 14:53:55

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you say..

It?s getting YAWN YAWN!!!!

Funny coz when I’m tired of something, I don’t bother with it

Yet you’re still pouring through each and EVERY word.

EJ Ruane
29   Posted 02/07/2008 at 14:57:50

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’Ste’ Kenny.

You say

"People who deride Tesco and shout the merits of Bestway (who!!!) are idiots"

Then reply to being called an idiot yourself with, "I’m positive I’m not an idiot"

(take as long as you like)
Jonathan Fletcher
30   Posted 02/07/2008 at 15:50:26

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Possibly the worst written post ever?

Complete jibberish.

If I understand what you are trying to say (and I don’t think I do) then this is complete fantasy.

Tesco are not going to spend 5% of their profits on a football club! Get real. Where is the shareholder value in that?
Ste Kenny
31   Posted 02/07/2008 at 17:42:33

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?EJ?, Thank you for allowing me as much time as I like; that's very gracious of you

Also why have you highlighted me posting my name as ?Ste?? ? is this a bit common for you or does this make my opinion less valid than yours?

You say I?m positive Ste Kenny is talking complete bollocks. I?m positive he?s an idiot. I?m also positive he works for Tesco.

You're a truly remarkable person; you can gauge my level of intelligence and where I work on the basis of one post. Perhaps you should put these mystical powers to good use, or failing that offer your opinion on the subject instead of talking bollocks about what the future will be like and how many monorails there will be.
Richard Harris
32   Posted 02/07/2008 at 18:03:27

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Tesco only ever does anything that benefits them so forget the every little helps slogan that pretends that they really care about their customers. As long as they keep prices low enough (but keep the shareholders sweet) then everybody is happy ? Try talking off the record to anyone who supplies Tesco. They play the tune and you dance to it. What has this to do with a stadium ? Tesco need the stadium as part of their deal, otherwise they wouldn’t even be involved with us. Forget that Terry Leahy is an Evertonian for one moment and wonder if that is misleading Bill Kenwright ? I’m sure that Terry Leahy would like the bonus in this scheme (a bit like Tesco club card points) to benefit the club but it’s all about Tesco and their profit. Now if we were getting a big slice of Tesco’s profits as part of the deal.......
EJ Ruane
33   Posted 02/07/2008 at 18:02:13

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Ste you say "the current board couldn’t run a church raffle"

I agree (so...WE agree)


Why would you trust a board who (as YOU say) can’t run a church raffle, to pick the right ’partner’?

Wouldn’t a useless board pick the WRONG partner? (clue: yes).

Would you want someone shite at maths working in the wages dept?

Didn’t you get a little suspicious when Sir Tez of Belle Vale came onto the board, in an ’advisory capacity’, and within months was advising us right out of Goodison?

You think that was for US!?

Oh I agree, Tesco are incredibly selling cheap spam.


Tesco Tez is not incredibly successful because he’s a sentimental oul’ blue.

He’s successful because he builds loads of Tesco stores, which means selling even more cheap spam, making bigger profits and so providing ever bigger dividends for the shareholders (nb: TESCO shareholders)

We’re just the football club he happens to ’support’

I mean FFS, Bobby Charlton was a great player but couldn’t manage for shite.

Two different jobs you see (or maybe you don’t)

This move is for Tesco NOT Everton.

I can’t force you or anyone else to ’get it’ but..there it is.

Finally, If you can call those who disagree with your point of view idiots.

EG: "People who deride Tesco and shout the merits of Bestway (who!!!) are idiots"

Then don’t whine when someone refers to you the same way.

If you do people will rightly think of Corporal Jones’s bayonet-related catch-phrase.
Ste Kenny
34   Posted 02/07/2008 at 19:07:35

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You?ve completely missed my point. I didn't get a vote; if I would have it would have been a resounding NO.

I dont wan't to go to Kirkby any more than you, I'm 100% opposed to the move. I don't need to ?get? it, I?ve already got it.

My initial point is that Tesco are a much bigger company than Bestway and it would be in the clubs interest to align themselves with companies of that stature.

Some posters talk about Tesco as if they're a stall in St Johns Market and it would be an embarrassment to be associated with them. IMO it would not.

Feel free to point me to the part where I whine about being called an idiot, I merely disagree with you on my level of intelligence.

It makes me laugh when people say Tesco are in it for themselves. Bestway are doing exactly the same just inside Liverpool city. boundaries.

With regards to the decision making at the club, the point I intended was Tesco have got where they are by making sound(ethical?) business decisions, we are where we are because of the opposite... so why would it be a bad move to be involved with them in some capacity?
Tom Hughes
35   Posted 02/07/2008 at 20:55:35

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What has Tesco’s wealth really gained us in all this? They have stated categorically that they are contributing zero towards the stadium...... so their billions, their turnover, their profit...... all means nothing in our context. We are in fact their planning enablers to allow them to create the largest Tesco supermarket on a site that does not warrant it, and still we are expected to find at least £78m+. Small change to mighty Tesco.
Neil Pearse
36   Posted 02/07/2008 at 22:47:00

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Tom, I see you disagree completely with your fellow No voters who recently have come on here in their droves to argue that the main reason for Kirkby is that the substantial Tesco / Knowsley ’subsidy’ will enable Bill to make a killing on his shares when he sells the club. At least you won’t therefore be accusing Kenwright of taking the club to Kirkby out of his own self-interest.
Derek Thomas
37   Posted 03/07/2008 at 07:07:29

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To those who missed my point ( not hard I know )

If, DK does go through, ( hope it doesn’t )

And it isn’t the roaring success the yeses hope it will be, ( not a shit show, for all the usual ’ no ’ reasons )

And there isn’t some sort of silver lining, then as some have IMO rightly said, there can be no going back, we will of painted our selves into a corner of our own making.

And, if the team under achieve for 3 out of 4 yrs instead of over achieving for 3 out of 4 yrs. Then we will be a gone-burger, a mere foot note, consigned to the dust bin of history, however illustrious it was and how ever well we know it. We will be,at worst, ranked, as if any body cares, along with other ’ historic ’ clubs like Blackpool and Burnley, who were left high and dry by the abolition of the maximum wage. At best we may become one of the up one year down the next Derby County’s

That without the RS’s one club one name one city bollocks

I well know this is exactly what the yeses say WILL happen if we DON’T.

The thing is... ONE OF US IS WRONG!

I hope it’s me....coz if I’m not and there is no silver lining .......
Ciarán McGlone
38   Posted 03/07/2008 at 09:29:26

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So we are comparing Tesco to Hitler now. Fucking grow up!

Sorry Terry. Mein furhrer.

Wind your fúckin neck in.
Tom Hughes
39   Posted 03/07/2008 at 11:56:42

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I’m sure ulterior motives and politics do come into the equation, but what form they take I’m not really prepared to over-speculate on because I’m sure there are those better placed than me to comment. I’m much more interested in the comparative merits of ALL options. I just thought that on this occasion Ste’s point regarding Tesco’s status and the value of its involvement needed challenging. The reason being that it has been a fairly common theme for people to mention Terry Leahy’s Evertonian credentials and Tesco’s wealth as major supporting factors for kirkby (especially since all others have long since withered), as if this really is a freeby and our best interests are their top priority. In reality this joint venture has bore no real fruit with some particularly sour tasting relocation/transport/cost issues thrown in too (None of which were highlighted at the vote). The Knight in shining armour via the enabling packages has so far delivered the equivalent cost of approx 25% of the stadium construction costs, just 10-15,000 of the 50,000 seats. This percentage will fall further if planning objections are upheld and the enablers shrink. Throw in the transport strategy which quite frankly is laughable and you would have to ask what has Tesco’s wealth and Terry Leahy got to do with anything? The whole charade has yielded the equivalent of just one new stand and the ground it sits on. Is that really sufficient to give up what we already have and all that it means to so many........especially given the nightmare transport plan?
Mike Dolan
40   Posted 05/07/2008 at 04:00:44

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In my very humble opinion on the two ground moves. Everton move is handled by people who love Everton. Liverpools illegal move has been made to happen by raping the city of it?s chartered green space for commercial gain and the Liverpool Council accept this with Evertonian Warren Bradley's legs akimbo. Everton will rise above all of these tawdry businessmen and wanker politicians. The club will be our club because we are the Golden Vision. We are a massive club struggling to be a business. In many ways we are perhaps the last of the First division.

The way that finance sharks have wrecked the financial structure just lately, I would think that any one with a brain in their heads could agree that LFC or the people of Liverpool are in any way having their lives improved by the erection of this particularly offensive American Football Thing on land entrusted to all the people of Liverpool, in a residential area under the leadership of Warren Bradley. Usually when things like this happen important people are paid off. Massively.

Tom Hughes
41   Posted 05/07/2008 at 16:25:42

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Mike Dolan,
Are you also suggesting that Knowsley’s politicians pockets have been lined too? What about ALL the other neighbouring councils who have unanimously objected to the Kirkby proposals..... who has paid them off?

This clouding of the issues with irrelevant politics and LFC’s affairs detracts from the real points. They are simply that Kirkby is a very poor option that has consistently avoided all comparison for good reason. The fact that it has generated the wholesale objection by EVERY surrounding authority questions its credibility as an option at all. The ever-changing cost to the club and farcical transport , and the poor stadium-design quality deceptions are all far more important and relevant than LFC and Stanley park. Mysteriously, YES voters rarely approach these issues nowadays..... I wonder why?

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