Season 2011-12
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Me and Daphne are going to look upstairs...

 31 Comments: First  |  Last

A number of those new fangled teenagers in a van catch The Phantom Transfer Bidder.
?Yoinks!? Says their pet dog.

?Lets see who?s really behind the Phantom Transfer Bid for Nikica Jelavić? says the tall strapping one. The mask is removed. Revealed to the world is ?Old Man Bill Kenwright!?

We?re broke, we?re skint. I can?t believe all the Bily £5m plus more is going to this Rangers man, with a similar wages too. Long forgotten bids for Michael Owen and Alan Smith are dredged up from memories past that tried and failed to placate the disgruntled masses.

He could of course sign today. Lovely. Yeah he?s not fast, but he obviously looks a talented all-round striker. A real asset. But that still leaves to mind where the hell is the money coming from?

If this is the case, and the man is introduced to the crowd tomorrow night, who isn?t in the starting XI against Citeh will be considerably more important than who is. Anyone dare think who will be missing?

Maybe its best to get an early night on Tuesday, these things are easier with a cup of coffee in hand and a new dawn ahead of us?

?And I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn?t for you pesky kids!?

Come on your Blues?


Nick Entwistle, London     Posted 30/01/2012 at 12:04:43

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Al Reddish
081   Posted 30/01/2012 at 20:38:13

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I think the fact Rodwell and Jagielka are injured means we won't sell anyone til the summer. I think the one leaving then could be Baines who has recently stated his desire for Champions League footie. Watch out for a tug of war battle between the 2 Manc clubs and Chelsea for Hibbert!
Shaun Brennan
090   Posted 30/01/2012 at 21:06:43

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AL Reddish what exactly did Baines say about Champs league football. I missed it.
Bob Skelton
091   Posted 30/01/2012 at 21:03:00

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Soon be April Fools Day.....Bill (Master PR Bluffer, especially for gullible Bluenoses) Kenwright is at it again..............

Roll on Transfer Deadline Day, see if I have to eat my words!
Nick Taylor
097   Posted 30/01/2012 at 21:13:59

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Brace your self for the alledged £5m being explained away against falling gate receipts and live televised game revenue and are squad remaining thesame give or take the odd journeyman no mark.

Some Evertonians havent got a scooby doo.
Jamie Barlow
100   Posted 30/01/2012 at 21:20:19

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http://www.nsno.co.uk/everton-news/2011/10/baines-has-champions-league-ambition/
Dick Fearon
101   Posted 30/01/2012 at 21:24:15

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Hey Nick, I am confused enough already! What are you dribbling on about?
Nick Entwistle
104   Posted 30/01/2012 at 21:38:30

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Well Dick, there's a Scooby-Doo narrative. If you don't know what that is, then imagine some doped up teens catching ghosts with a great-dane possessing the ability to talk.

And then there's phantom bids made in the past for Michael Owen and Alan Smith where the amounts offered were simply not credible and were made to make the board look like they had the ambition when in reality they had nothing but ten pence between them.

And further still, if this Croat does make the move, then all this suddenly available money will come from a perfectly timed transfer going through after the City match tomorrow. Keeps the Goodison faithful on side during the match.
Jay Harris
108   Posted 30/01/2012 at 21:56:55

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I dunno, the cost of keeping a BU protest down.

Will it be another "Manny Fernandes" who will "sign in the morning" but was never offered a contract or will Billy boy spoil his man and give him the proceeds of Billy's transfer whilst pocketing away the £30 million got out of player and Bellefield sales in the last 12 months and now quietly forgotten.

The black hole strikes again!!
Gavin Ramejkis
110   Posted 30/01/2012 at 22:05:16

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Wonder if Kenwight will wave his credit card shaped IOU to Phil Green at the fans again tomorrow night?

Worst chairman in the club's history and you still get fools believing it his bullshit.
Brian Waring
114   Posted 30/01/2012 at 22:14:38

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I reckon Jelavic will be paraded before the game tomorrow, with Blue Bill's face up on the screen, and there will be fans clapping him, and jizzing everywhere.
Stephen Kenny
121   Posted 30/01/2012 at 22:32:41

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I'd boo him if we signed Ronaldo and Messi and I'd boo Moyes for playing them and I'd boo Round for coaching them and I'd boo Ray Hall for not findi.........Shit wrong thread.
Marc Williams
122   Posted 30/01/2012 at 22:34:29

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Will Rangers sell Jelavić for a Scooby Snack ?

maybe.....

After all we sold Yak for peanuts!
Dennis Stevens
134   Posted 30/01/2012 at 23:12:30

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Which one's Daphne, the dumpy one with specs or the dim skinny one?
Martin Cooke
160   Posted 31/01/2012 at 05:07:26

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The skinny one; the dumpy one was Velma.
Claire Cavendish
161   Posted 31/01/2012 at 05:40:10

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Oi, Velma's not dumpy, she's cuddly, that Daphne is all skin and bones and swoons over Fred all the time.

Just thought that if we don't sign anyone, we may end up in a relegation scrap(py doo)!

I'll get me coat...
Tony Waring
190   Posted 31/01/2012 at 09:29:35

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Funny that Fernandes should have been mentioned (Jay)). It got me wondering what he's doing now and if he's even playing regularly. I was all for signing him at the time but maybe DM knew something we fans did'nt?
Dave Roberts
229   Posted 31/01/2012 at 12:52:32

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He's at Finch Farm now having a medical. If he's having a medical I assume the personal terms are agreed so unless one his legs falls off during the examination it looks odds on he's coming.

It will be Bily's £5m down and the other £3m over twenty five years.....or something like that!
Vincent Steele
233   Posted 31/01/2012 at 13:14:23

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Any one else notice this? Chief football writer Phil McNulty on Twitter: "Louis Saha from Everton to Spurs now looking a done deal. Really intriguing move that."
Erik Dols
234   Posted 31/01/2012 at 13:18:32

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Tony Waring (190),

He's playing for Besiktas, big club in Turkey. They signed him for only ?2 mln apparently. At least he's playing in Europe...
James Marshall
236   Posted 31/01/2012 at 13:40:01

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Saha is going to Spurs on loan and we're getting Pienaar back - this is great news, along with Jelavic and the young Greek defender.
Phil Bellis
238   Posted 31/01/2012 at 13:47:49

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Young greek defender - he say "piss off, thank you"
James Marshall
239   Posted 31/01/2012 at 13:49:14

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Did he? I thought it was pretty much a done deal.
Mark Murphy
241   Posted 31/01/2012 at 13:47:52

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Pienaar is wanted by QPR who are offering £70k per week. I doubt very much he will come here or that Spurs would do a straight swap ? him for Saha.

Saha is not going on loan ? he's going full stop ? only 6 month left on his contract. And the Greek lad isn't coming either. Shame... Pienaar & Baines again would be great.
Alan McGuffog
244   Posted 31/01/2012 at 14:42:41

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Phil 238
I was listening to a radio feature last night about the state of the Greek economy and it's effect on the aspirations of young people there. It said, more or less, that any talented young person was getting the Hell out of Greece as the future looked so bleak in terms of building a career etc.
There's obviously desperation and desperation though, isn't there. Things may be bleak but not that bad....go where ? Everton ? Thanks but I'll take me chances at home !
Anthony Millington
245   Posted 31/01/2012 at 14:46:18

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Fernandes is a hell of a player, had alot of injuries at Valencia and went to Besiktas with fellow Portugese players Quaresma, Simao and Almeida. Watched him against Stoke a couple of times this season and he bossed the game. Would walk into our team FACT.
James Marshall
254   Posted 31/01/2012 at 15:14:13

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Chief football writer Phil McNulty on Twitter: "Hearing no go on Alessio Cerci for Everton - but other options of bringing in players being actively pursued by David Moyes. Louis Saha lined up for 18-month deal at Spurs - and still plenty of whispers about Steven Pienaar returning to Everton."
Phil Bellis
258   Posted 31/01/2012 at 15:18:23

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Alan,
Seems personal terms were the issue!
God, they're all at it
Jamie Sweet
420   Posted 01/02/2012 at 02:07:05

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Nick - I have read this article numerous times, and still don't really understand what you're on about... but would it be fair to assume that you were wrong?

Would it also be fair to assume if you're happy to be wrong?!
Michael Kenrick
448   Posted 01/02/2012 at 04:18:48

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I'm guessing Bewitched...

No, that's not right. Er...what the hell is it called?

Oh yea, Twilight or something like that?

It's a generational thing.

This is for Eugene:

"Just a song at twilight, when the lights are low,
And the flick'ring shadows softly come and go.
Tho' the heart be weary, sad the day and long,
Still to us at twilight comes love's old sweet song."

Didn't we used to sing that on the old Gwladys Street? Or am I thinking of my old man in the back garden, pruning his dahlias?
Eugene Ruane
474   Posted 01/02/2012 at 07:45:27

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If it was sung Michael, it was before my time. The first St End songs I heard were much less poetic and far more..um..'instructional'.
Nick Entwistle
492   Posted 01/02/2012 at 09:01:13

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Jaime, on the contrary I'm delighted to be right! Goodbye Saha!

We've spent what we got for Bily, and with Saha out and Pienaar in we're probably saving a packet on wages.

Yes I was expecting a big name player to potentially leave, and to an effect that happened, but more someone who would have been one for the overdraft.

We'll do this all again in the Summer.

(By the way, who the hell can't understand the Scooby-Doo theme?)

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