ToffeeWeb - Season 2009-10

The Mail Bag

Sunshine Superman

As the Landon Donovan deal looks close to completion, let us welcome him and hope all goes well.

The 60s Donovan (Donovan Leitch, a Glasgow lad) singer had a number of hits. 'Catch the Wind' was followed by others, but Californian Landon as our Sunshine Superman surely has to be the most promising.
Keith Glazzard, Fallowfield Posted 10/12/2009 at 16:25:27

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Gerry Morrison
1 Posted 11/12/2009 at 04:48:00

First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is.

Mike Gaynes
2 Posted 11/12/2009 at 05:32:14

Keith, old rocker, don’t stop there. If we’re to pay a proper Donovan tribute to the occasion, we’d have to say that Everton are having an injury-cursed Season Of The Witch, with too many Hurting Gurdy Men on the sidelines. There Is A Mountain to climb to qualify for Europe next season, so Landon is flying across the Atlantis, hoping to give his teammates Ten Good Reasons (I slipped in a little Jason Donovan there) to cheer his arrival.

Landon will be looking forward to donning our Colours, especially that Mellow Yellow patch on the sleeve, and making those Happiness Runs up the right touchline, where the defenders might as well try to Catch The Wind as tackle him. Of course Arteta and Osman will be back soon to challenge Landon for his place, but that’s a Good Problem to Have (okay, some Donovan Chapman there).

And of course in his off-hours he’ll be texting To Susan On The West Coast Waiting for his return. (Probably the reason he just split with his wife.)

Had enough? I got more...

Ciarán McGlone
3 Posted 11/12/2009 at 09:33:23

How about the blind beggar and the gypsy..

Sums up our transfer capabilities perfectly...

Alan McGuffog
4 Posted 11/12/2009 at 09:59:47

Cobblers to all that..... I just hope Farrell, Eglington, Clinton and O’Neil come back as well.

Tommy Gourlay
5 Posted 11/12/2009 at 10:17:48

Mike, as you’ve mentioned ’the Jason’ I must say that I hope Donovan doesn’t have to take part in a penalty shoot out for us and that our fate is ’sealed with a miss’ and leaves ’too many broken hearts in the [Everton fans] world’......

Gerry Quinn
6 Posted 11/12/2009 at 11:42:12

Mike Gaynes - a hilarious and ingeniously written respite - just wondering what you would have come up with if we were signing a player named Joe Dolce. (Aaaaagggh!)

Brian Williams
7 Posted 11/12/2009 at 12:00:40

Strong stuff that Skunk!!!!

Anthony Doran
8 Posted 11/12/2009 at 12:02:59

Donovan is here to spy on the English ahead of the world cup. He’s here to learn the art of fluid crisp passing football that is the Everon way! USA USA USA!

Chris Perry
9 Posted 11/12/2009 at 12:55:13

I have said it before and I will say it again. This is a bad move by Everton. Clearly shows that we have no ambition; this Donovan plays in a poor leauge, which is full of never-has-beens and never-will-bes. His stint in Europe on previous occasions has been pretty non-"setting the world on fire".

My honest assessment is a knee-jerk, free loan signing. He is another Joe Max-Moore in the waiting and we will be no better off. He is certainly no better than any of the kids we have currently warming our bench!

Marco Buonfiglio
10 Posted 11/12/2009 at 13:06:40

Alan McGuffog, amen to that. Or at least the spirit of them ... meanwhile... having nearly been lynched in Bristol in 1990 when I reflexively celebrated Sheedy’s equalizer, I’m now looking forward to celebrating Donovan’s winner on June 12 at Rustenberg, along with Howard’s clean sheet.

Mike Gaynes
11 Posted 11/12/2009 at 16:07:17

Thanks, Gerry. Actually, one of my musical puns was deleted by an overly efficient editor. My original note had Landon flying across the ATLANTIS (an old Donovan hit), but someone (Mr. Kenrick, I presume?) assumed it was a typo and "corrected" it. Ah, well.

And Marco, thanks for mentioning Sheedy’s equalizer. That’s the very moment I became an Everton fan. However, if the US doesn’t come up with some healthy defenders soon, June 12 is going to look more like the Burning of Washington than the Battle of New Orleans.

Kevin Jones
12 Posted 11/12/2009 at 16:36:34

Hi Mike, Do the police know about you "slipping in a little Jason Donovan "

Ohh Missus

Mike Gaynes
13 Posted 11/12/2009 at 16:38:47

Chris, you should stop saying it then, because you sound more foolish every time. If you really don’t think Donovan is any better than Moore, you should ask Brazil, Italy, Mexico and Sweden. They would argue otherwise.

And if you really don’t think Donovan is better than Gosling, Wallace, Baxter and whoever else you’re fantasizing about from the Everton reserves, you need some rewiring, because all the bulbs on your tree are out.

Mike Gaynes
14 Posted 11/12/2009 at 16:49:45

The whole conversation may be academic anyway. Sky Sports is reporting the Galaxy’s announcement that a number of other teams are in for Donovan besides us.

Michael Kenrick
Editorial Team
15 Posted 11/12/2009 at 16:59:44

Sorry, Mike... I looked twice at that one and thought it might be deliberate... I didn’t know the song but "flying across the Atlantis" just seems wrong to me... "flying across Atlantis" I could accept.

Mike Gaynes
16 Posted 11/12/2009 at 17:10:11

No problem, Michael. The sentence was the product of a large glass of brandy anyway.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go talk to a cop at my front door. He says somebody named Kevin sent him.

Ohhh, mama.

Keith Glazzard
17 Posted 11/12/2009 at 22:10:48

If other clubs are interested I would hope that we are very close by now, and that the Big Tim connection might help. Just have to wait and see...

’The Battle of New Orleans’ Mike? - Lonnie Donegan. Now we’re talking.

Anthony Millington
18 Posted 12/12/2009 at 10:44:08

We haven’t signed him yet, other clubs are interested in him now...I wonder who he will choose...

Neil Vaughan
19 Posted 12/12/2009 at 11:40:50

Have to agree wih Chris on this.having watched this fella regularly this season...He is crap !!
Just about sums up the ambition of this club, Board and manager...another no-name one paced plodder to add to the all the other ’also rans’ we already have,,,,to be fair to Jo Max he is actually a better player than Donovan...all ready failed in Germany and WILL fail here

Of course this is just my opinion but anyone who is ’excited’ by this possible is seriouly deluded.

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