John! Wake up!

Quickly, John's having that dream again....somebody wake him up before he hurts himself!

I will desperately believe this will happen.

Would love to be a fly on the wall listening to BK trying to persuade the special one that Goodison is his next home:

Special: "So. Money. I can buy Cristiano right?"

BK: "Probably not. Unless the Real Madrid board are huge musical fans."

Special: "Hmmm. I know some other good players, I can spend... what... £30m? £40m?"

BK: "Yeah, something like that. Maybe a bit more £3m or £4m?"

Special: "Ha! You make good joke!"

BK: "Yes, I'm good at the jokes! Ha ha ha... errrm."

Special: "You have some OK players. I like that big hair fella."

BK: "Ah yes, he probably won't be here next season."

Special: "Why not?"

BK: "Well, we usually have to sell our best player each summer to pay off the loans as I don't have any money or mystery investors up my sleeve."

Special: "Oh. Ah... you make another joke?"

BK: "Erm..."

Special: "Ha ha, very funny man you are. No money, sell best players... ha ha ha."

BK: "Yes, ha ha. Now if you could just sign here..."

Can I have what John is drinking, please?

He wouldn't be accepted by the ToffeWeb community, I mean he is a defensive manager. Martinez would show him a thing or two about how to play attacking football........ I suspect all these football purists would sudenly lose their ideological fervour under the glut of wins and trophies.

Every once in a while (maybe once a month) we get a "dreamer" thread - and I certainly don't begrudge you John as it sure would be nice. However, since these maggots have come on BOARD, we have NEVER once pulled a rabbit out of the hat.

A fish rots from the head
Everton rot from within

This relies on a takeover at Goodison and I don't mean the Goodison Supper Bar. Therefore, it is just fantasy. I did have a dream we were bought out the other day. I woke up in my dream and the news was on talking about us getting a brand new stadium. Then I woke up. It was all just a dream.

I'm with you John. Let's dare to dream...

This is an absolute certainty after all Moyes is bound for Chelsea isn't he?

"Morphine please nurse ...the headaches are coming back"

At least we can keep the MOB in business.

John, leave the dreaming to old blue Bill, he's been dreaming for the past 15 years...

Dreaming of the times he spent on uncle Cyril's handle-bars, the Boys Pen in his threadbare kecks with holes in his shoes watching the Canonball Kid, dreaming 24/7 of a knight in shining armour coming to rescue his beloved Everton, dreaming of being with Eddie Kavanagh in 1966 and Elvis after we won the Cup.

Daydream believer, indeed – all dew-eyed and emotional at the prospect of David not popping around anymore for egg on toast for supper as they watch a DVD compilation of potential 'transfer-targets' punctuated with the occasional 'wow' as Riquelme et al dance the fandango...

The Special One or Anyone. Whoever it is will be under the same constraints as Moyes.

Fun read, though.

I don't think for one moment Mourinho would consider coming to us but I do know that he has a healthy respect for the Everton crowd. He frequently referred to the fantastic support that the team received when he brought his Chelsea team here.

James Martin,

He is not a defensive coach.
He invites teams on to his defence then plays counter attacking football.
Subtle difference.

Maureen at Goodison........His wages alone would be our next transfer kitty for the next 3 years.

He says - "There are things that may be about to happen no-one could imagine".

Wow, that 'NO-ONE-COULD-IMAGINE'

WELL then...what if - just...just...what if???

Mourinho decides he's fed up with having a boss, with having someone 'above' him.

So he announces his retirement from the game.

Then using his vast savings, he opens a high-rollers, exclusive lap-dancing club in Lisbon, named Los Minge.

The club, because of it's famous owner, is instantly world-famous and patronised by 'the great and the good' (ie: the rich).

Within 10 years, there are 34 Los Minge clubs around the world and Mourinho has personal wealth of roughly 350m.

He then decides to sell his shares and buy a football club, one that he can manage as well as own and run

Now what if....just..just...what if???....

Eugene, we'd end up with Les Mingers though?

Good responses fella's! it was tongue in cheek and I was bored shitless in work.....(hopefully obvious) but thought I'd change the tone a bit

He is a manager who needs lots of cash to be successful.

BK would be looking for someone to manage Everton who is tight fisted.

Steavey (917) "He is a manager who needs lots of cash to be successful"

Don't know if that was the case in 2004 when he won the CL with Porto (plus the uefa cup and whatever he won in Portugal).

He certainly wouldn't have the money available to most of the teams he beat on the way to lifting the trophy.

Come to think of it, when we were 21st (or in the top 25) on the rich list (around 2008..ish) I don't remember them being above us (could be wrong).

There's a thought, European trophies being won by a team (or teams) with less money than us (if that's the case...and it probably isn't - anyone know?)

What about the school of science? I thought most on here would take a lower league position for a team that played the game 'as it should be player'.

Mourinho is as pragmatic a manager you're going to find. Keep it tight and nick a goal is his base.

Besides he always requires millions and millions.

Plus, im sure people have criticised moyes for being arrogant.

Fran Mitchell,

Mourinho has kept it tight and nicked 89 league goals this season.In 28 league games.

Eugene,

Don't know if you have seen this but quite an interesting article on an alternative operating model.

http://footballspeak.com/post/2012/09/12/FC-Porto-Moneyball.aspx

I'm prepared to dream too. I've mentioned JM as a live possibility since it was announced he would be leaving Madrid.

This is based on nothing else but the man's narcissism: the idea of PROVING his greatness as a manager by reviving a sleeping giant with no more than the power of his inspirational personality might just tickle his ego-bone.

If he failed, he can blame lack of finance and join United in 2 years with reputation untainted.

If he joined us, his profile and leadership would force change and growth, and any sort of success would ensure world football hall-of-fame status.

And if it went tits up and imploded gloriously, how is that worse than the slow death we're suffering now?

Chances? About 0.1 per cent. About twice the probability of us ever regaining past glories with Moyes and Kenwright in charge.

Porto lost against Real Madrid, and then beat Marseille, United, Lyon, Deportivo and Monaco to win the Champions League. With exception to United, Porto were the favourites in each game they played.

Dan (935) - "Porto lost against Real Madrid, and then beat Marseille, United, Lyon, Deportivo and Monaco to win the Champions League. With exception to United, Porto were the favourites in each game they played"

Maybe they were 'favourites', but were they wealthier?

Fran Mitchell (930) and Steavey (917) both state he needs money to be successful, I'm suggesting the Porto side that won the CL and Uefa cup almost certainly beat teams that were financially better off.

I could be wrong on that but I doubt it as even we (I'm fairly sure) were higher up the rich list than Porto for a few years in the 80s and may even still be.

If they ARE wealthier than us, see Graham's link (933) to see why.

Er..no not the '80s', the 'noughties' or whatever it's called.

If it doesn't happen will it be Moyesies fault, or Nev's, Ossies's, or Hibbo's?

I would suggest that they were the wealthier, based on the fact that they have won their domestic league 26 times, and won was the only team out of the list bar united that had actually won the European Cup. The season before, they had won the treble so to suggest that they were a poor team that was miraculously guided to winning the CL by Mourinho's management skills would be unfair on the players at his disposal. Players such as, Postiga, Deco, Costinha, Maniche, Pedro Mendes & Jorge Costa.

Monaco by comaprison, had just been threatened to be relegated to league 2 by the French FA for amassing 50 million euros in debt. They then appealed, and had a transfer embargo instead of the relegation. So I would suggest that Porto were far better off financially.

Dan (945) - "The season before, they had won the treble so to suggest that they were a poor team that was miraculously guided to winning the CL by Mourinho's management skills would be unfair on the players at his disposal. Players such as, Postiga, Deco, Costinha, Maniche, Pedro Mendes & Jorge Costa".

You might be right I have absolutely no idea and am only guessing (I simply can't be arsed searching everything on google as I think if fucks up my memory which is shocking to begin with).

So I'll give it one more guess.

The players you name didn't cost them more than a few mill and that some/most/all of them were home grown.

According to the article Graham posted, it seems to me they are, like us, a team that has had to sell to keep afloat.

That said, what they have bought cheap and/or brought through their ranks appears to be incredible.

Put it another way, I wish we'd have had the bloke who sold Hulk selling Rooney - we might ACTUALLY have got BK's 50m.

As for Mourinho, the idea that he can ONLY be successful with money (or zillions) is, imo, just daft.

If only.... how mint would that be? A special one and some major investment? Yes please!

I tried to get odds on the special one for the Pope I reckon that they would be even longer for the real top job at Everton.

I prefer to focus my dreams in an entirely different direction normally around beautiful needy women; very long odd there as well

"What if" we manage to finish 4th........ or should that be 5th....... tbc.

Actually Anthony you can get odds on Sky Bet of 40/1 for the Special One to be our next manager. He didn't specifically say Chelsea did he? He said he will return to England but he didn't say which team.
Can we dare to dream?!
Moyes out, Jose in!

So what you are suggesting Eugene is that Mourinho didn't need the 200 million to win the title with Chelsea? Or a similar figure at Inter? Or the 360 million euro's at Real? I would have to disagree, and suggest he would have achieved nothing without spending big money. And I would happily bet a grand that with Everton's funds he wouldn't win a thing. He is a good manager without doubt, but he is not a magician.

Eugene #907

Don't you know the gender of a minge yet? La Minga; Las Mingas. And where can you buy those Magic Mushrooms on the Wirral?

I think it's fair to say that Mourinho is a great manager, given what he has won so far even if he has had a fair bit of cash to do it. It's not particularly fair to compare him with Moyes as he hasn't had a great deal. I would disagree with him not winning a thing as I reckon he might win a cup given enough time and a bit of luck, and he might get us in the champions league and maybe through to the group stage. I feel the league is a bit out of the question without the cash. I don't imagine him being the dream for people who want Moyes out because the football could be prettier at times, as noted above he is a pragmatist and not particularly noted for his teams playing pretty stuff. Anyway it's not all about the cash as there have been plenty of managers who have spent like drunken sailors and still won nothing.

As if Mourinho would work for a buffoon like Bill Kenwright.

One of, if not THE, most ridiculous thread I've seen on here, in my opinion.

Get a grip, John.

Until England can look beyond the likes of Gerrard & Milner, they will never win anything. Gerrard must have given the ball away at least half a dozen times already (40 mins) Is to possible to a great P.L. player, but a shite International?

He looks finished to me, can't see him carrying the shite next season.

"Basement bargains" I wouldn't have thought Mourinho has even heard of those words. It's like telling him to shop in Primark and only buy items with a 70% off tag attached. No chance.

Only chance of Mourinho getting £200m to send is if he uses his own savings....

Ross (#952) — what's odds for the Pope....

Dan (954) - "So what you are suggesting Eugene is that Mourinho didn't need the £200 million to win the title with Chelsea? Or a similar figure at Inter? Or the €360 million at Real? I would have to disagree, and suggest he would have achieved nothing without spending big money".

Well you are dead wrong and apparently ignoring what is fact.

We KNOW he won a CL and a Uefa Cup with Porto without spending big money (nb: for 'big', I'll use as a guide the figures YOU quote).

So he DID achieve something without spending big money.

That's not my opinion or guesswork – that's what happened when he was manager of Porto.

By all means feel free to 'yeah but, no but' – it won't alter anything.

If on the other hand you actually want to learn something..

http://www.zonalmarking.net/2010/03/08/teams-of-the-decade-3-porto-2002-04/

Looks like Jose has started the procedure to go back to Chelsea.Mercenary bastard.He has a choice between a club that will give him unlimited transfer funds,a club where he can live in a £6 million house in Chelsea,a club where he can be near his daughter who has just started uni in London.....or he could go to a club where there is no transfer budget,a club where the debt is increasing year on year,a club where the chairman tells us one of the stands will have to close down due to a safety certificate issue,a club where the squad has been allowed to grow old etc etc.
The game is being ruined by these money grabbing bastards.

Dream on, you beautiful dreamer, you!

Well he did once tell Chelsea fans that they needed to be more like Everton fans!!!

My colleague checked into the Wyndham Grand Hotel in Chelsea Harbour on Monday and bumped into the Special One at reception.

José that is, not Davey Moyes.

I had to pinch myself when we signed Paul Gascoigne a few years back. I wouldn't like to think what equipment I will need to apply the pinch if the Special One rocked up as our manager.

My colleague checked into the Wembley Hilton.
He didn't see David there

Are you on medication John?

Maybe Mourinho could buy us for £125m, buy a new stadium,and keep Blue Bill on as chairman??? Sounds plausible to me. Get working Bill if you have time to do so in the 24/7 search.....

Mourinho is also 1-2 as next Chelsea manager.
and 40-1 as next Everton manager.
Behind such candidates as Walter Smith, Roy Keane and Paul Ince, Malky Mackay and Nigel Adkins.

John,
3 major problems with your dream:

1. Mourhino's daughter is going to college in London where he has a house already so expect it to be a London club.

2. Kim Jung Bill will never relinquish his train set unless he gets a stupid offer from a mega rich arab (who are not that stupid).

3. We could not afford his wage demands.

So regrettably back to the real world of expecting more of the same.

Mourinho would absolutely do a great job for Everton, even on a tight budget. He's a genius.

What sort of egotistical prick calls himself The Special One? He's not a full shilling, that's for sure... But could you just imagine our lovable neighbours if he rolled up here... ho ho!

What if....?

My wife cooked my tea, let me watch the match in peace and then gave me some sweet sweet loving... all in one day!!!!

More chance of the special one at Goodison.

I would have Benitez... er, on second thoughts, no I would not.