Moysie — The new 3 hour hollywood epic about a coach who started off with nothing and ended up with something...
David Moyes, speaking during his Interview for the Everton Managers job:
'Ladies and gentlemen... I've traveled over half the footballing wilderness to get here. I couldn't get away sooner because my team failed in the playoffs. That team is now doing better than when I first started and it's paying me a decent income. I have youngsters coming through and I have money in the bank to purchase new players. So, ladies and gentlemen... if I say I'm an football man you will agree. You have a great chance here, but bear in mind, you can lose it all if you're not careful. Out of all men that beg for a chance to coach your players, maybe one in twenty will be a football man; the rest will be speculators.
Men trying to get between you and the football agents-to get some of the money that ought by rights come to your club. Even if you find one that has ambition, and means to be a success , he'll maybe known nothing about coaching and he'll have to splash out the money on many players, and then you're depending on a coach that's trying to rush the job through so he can get another job just as quick as he can. This is the way this works.'
'I do my own coaching and the men that work for me, work for me and they are men I know. I make it my business to be there and see to their work. I don't throw my money about but I am big enough to admit to making mistakes with money in the past; I don't suffer fools gladly and I can be as stubborn as hell, but I'm a people man. I run a peoples club.'
Some years later in the leadup to the great Rooney sale saga:
Moyes: Drainage! Drainage, Wayne, you boy. Drained dry. I'm so sorry. Here, if you have a WKD, and I have a WKD, and I have a straw. There it is, that's a straw, you see? You watching?. And my straw reaches acroooooooss the room, and starts to drink your WKD... I... drink... your... WKD!
Moyes: I drink it up!
Rooney: Don't bully me, Davie!
[Davie roars and throws Wayne across the room]
Moyes: Did you think your pace and skill and your fancy moves would help you, Wayne? I am the
Moyesiah! I am who the Lord has chosen! In Moyes....THEY...TRUST!
Paul Stretford: Mr Moyes, you have come here and you have brought organisation and stability, but you have also brought your bad habits as a coach. You've lusted after inferior players, and you have abandoned their child. Their child that they raised, you have abandoned all because he was ambitious and you have sinned. So say it now- I am a sinner.
Moyes: I am a sinner.
Moyes' final words to Rooney before he left: You're not one of mine. You have none of me in you.
David Moyes, when signing Yakubu:
'Now, Mr. Yakubu, I'm not going to waste your time, and I'd certainly appreciate it if you didn't waste mine. If you wish to sign with me, we can have a contract drawn up within ten days. But your fitness is somewhat less than the lads we have up here, and so, well that means we'll probably have to work you harder. If there's as much left in those legs as I think there is, it'll be harder to reach but once we find it, we can get you running around like a 18 year old again. You have to sign quickly, because very soon those legs will be gone. Now... I need you to know what you want to do. Now, because of the time it will take to get back your fitness, I'll pay you a smaller royalty than you'd get down there in London, but I'm prepared to give you a hundred thousand pound bonus if you sign for us.'
Some years later two old friends are chatting in a corporate hospitality box:
Alan Irvine: Why do you get the sack at Newcastle?
Moyes: I don't want to talk about those things. I saw the worst in players. I don't need to look past seeing them to get all I need. I've built my hatreds up over the years about skillful players, little by little, Alan... to have you there gave me a second breath. I couldn't keep doing it on my own with those... people.
(Original writing credits go to Paul Thomas Anderson and Upton Sinclair)
End Note: This may come across as a bit harsh on Davie (particularly the Paul Stretford bit) but I just found it amusing how similar certain situations where in the film to that of our manager. Hopefully the season will end better than it did for old Plainview!
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