Lamine Kone ‘disappointed’ to miss out on ‘golden opportunity’ to join Everton

He's been awful in the games I've seen this season. I think we got lucky missing out on him.

Believe it or not, apparently Kone is on £90k a week at Sunderland, no wonder he didn't sign for us. Football has definitely gone bonkers.

1. He was just after more money;

2. He's not good enough and certainly no better than we already have playing or on the bench.

I'd leave well alone.

My Scott Dann is bigger than your Scott Dann!!! Really lads?

I agree, Kone has been rank when I've watched him and, worse of all, either he wasn't trying or is quite pedestrian. Give him a swerve.

Yes, we are greatly improved at the back this season, compared to last (be hard to be worse) but I still feel we lack height and physicality and I still sweat bullets when the opposition's attack includes a Benteke or a Carroll.

I would love Walsh to unearth some huge grock with a CV that reads like the first frame synopsis from a 'Score n roar' character.

"6'-8" Russian lemonade thief Nokka Kraytopopoff is sent to the salt mines in Siberia for his crimes. While there, he keeps boredom at bay by heading stalactites from cave ceilings. On his release, he is thought to have the toughest forehead in the world – a fact that doesn't escape scouts at Premier League giants Everton..."

Etc blah.

...who promptly slap in a £22m bid and apply for a work permit, only for it to be later revealed that he's actually a character from a 1992 platform game on the Super Nintendo and the 'scouting footage' they'd been so impressed by was actually a retro gaming review some sad 40-year-old had uploaded to YouTube. 

Straight-talking boss Ronald Koeman promptly strips the Siberian of a squad number and informs him he should start looking for another club, as his chances of getting a game are only 62% greater than Oumar Niasse ever having his name announced at Goodison again.

Sunderland and wherever Harry  Redknapp happens to show his face next rumoured to be 'well interested' in taking him on loan until the end of the season. 

(And have a care, for some on TW, 'rumoured to be interested' means 'absofuckingdefinitely are'!)

As for whether Scott Dann is 6'-5" or 6'-2", I can safely say that, as a kid growing up in the Billogs in Kirkdale, his ral fellah Richie (6'-3") could swing off the second landing and butt a burst Wembley trophy straight through the wash house window from twenty foot in the air, so the kid is from real centre-half grock stock, as for being tough.

He was cock of English martyrs From first year onwards were he studied woodwork (writing not being his forte) reaching CSE Grade E level, In fact, he was 6ft when he made his holy communion in matching red velvet trousers and waistcoat made by wonder Taylor John Doyle. Hair by Denis Kerrigan.

Oh and, for what it's worth, his lad is 6''-5".

I hope we go back in for him, he'll add some healthy competition at the back.

He, and his colleague were appalling against us.