Mina ruled out with minor injury

Totally agree, buddy, people keep mentioning Funes Mori as if we should've kept him, he's been absolutely garbage since his injury (tbh, was only an average player before injury). Him, Jagielka and Williams starting a game over the past season was like gifting the opposition a goal before a ball was even kicked.

I would've much preferred promoting a centre-half from the U23s and giving them valuable experience, than playing any of them 3 overpaid, wastes of space.

Hope it's not a wrist injury like when Omar arrived and they saw him in the flesh.

As for him being selected for the Argentine squad... well we saw the current state of their defense at the World Cup, didn't we?

On a more serious note, I of course hope he's a new belter of a centre-half.

I started to type that as the guy who tried to row the Atlantic with one arm - but realised that would sound as if he used an arm not a paddle. That would take some guts.

Just imagined... ah forget it.

(A chuckle for my fellow Yanks.)

A joke just sprung to mind, ever heard of Jeremy Beadle?

He had one small hand and one large hand.

The joke is:

Jeremy Beadle has got an extremely small penis, but on the other hand, it's rather large.

Boom boom lol.

I'm almost ashamed to say that Beadle gag is one of my all-time favourites from my childhood.

The other...

Two dyslexics in a room. One says, “Can you smell gas?”
The other replies, “Smell gas?! I can't even smell my own name!”

Just woke me girlfriend up, giggling away like a little kid after reading that joke and I got a dig to the ribs from her.

So thanks for that, lol.

David Ellis 14

You're showing your ignorance there, I'm afraid, David. I'm not a huge fan of all of his work, but Beadle was actually an incredibly intelligent and creative bloke.

See here:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7217342.stm

ps: I think he was also a Blue.

Jags has done well through the years but his time is up.

I predict he will be amazing.

Same man goes into H Samuel and flops it on the counter, "This is a clock shop, not a cock shop" says the assistant. "Well, put two hands on this" says the man.

I'm here all week!

We are lucky that we didn't try to get him this summer.

I hope Mina works out better.

This wonderful local paper then post a list of players Everton could sign because they're out of contract — enough to say the list includes Jack Rodwell.

But it doesn't stop there: they say, despite both Brands and Silva turning down offers for Lookman, they quote Goal magazine saying they believe Everton will sell Lookman for 㿆 million.

They also report that Niasse may be on his way to Galatasaray. Now I have no idea if any of this is true but forgive me for being cynical – I couldn't see them touting Liverpool players to be moved on.