Supporters who get on the back of one of their players. Most of all Suarez. Even seeing his name in print makes me ill. The lowest form of racist, cheating despicable vermin ever to kick a football. Don't get me started on Gerrard.

Drivers who wear hats (baseball or trilby) guaranteed menace on the roads.

Being able to spot "the formula" and therefore outcome of every TV show 2 mins in.

People without judgement who rely on stats.

Not getting what's funny about monologues about a la Bishop and Macintyre.

Refs addressing players as "Becks" etc

Managers being paid so much and simply protecting their loot so the likes of a Clough or Shankly arising has gone.

The cartel of the energy companies particularly pretending there's genuine competition - fuck right off.

Ditto the financial sector including all banks investment or otherwise and the self policing of same that encourages corruption.

I could go on but I need to get up early.

Mayonnaise

American football comentator, Chris Collinsworth.

My job at McDonald's.

My boss at McDonald's.

Old people who drive really slowly makes my list

2. The deep-fat fryerist at my McDonalds, Pat (Fuck off, I'm on break) Finegan.

But the worst was Cucumber and Green Beans on my vegetarian pizza... in Senegal, Africa.

The singular thing women do where we men can state as fact, "There's not a part of my body we play with as much as that".

Guaranteed to pay with a dodgy credit card that fucks the machine just for a curly wurly, tin of cat food, bottle of cider and a family pack of crisps.

Davina Mcall.

Blaming refs.

Common sense (there's no such concept)

Clocks going back/forward.

Modern cars (ecu's, sensors, catalytic converters)

The myth we all support "the royals"

Banning AGMs and fans not twigging they're saying "fuck you but keep supporting"

And Liverpool.

I'm thinking badge man, the bell ringer, tango man, Newcastle supporters with tops off etc...

I agree. I'm a scouser.

I married a Gogg.

Pretty much everything else, apparently, according to my missus.

They do this at the self service tills in Tesco, but before they pay, they scan their items. But don't bag. They then pay. And then bag.

No wonder they all believe they're this supposed modern woman, having very little time on their hands. No shit.

As for the Norwegians, they're a harmless bunch with their funny hurdy gurdy sounding language and their novelty woolly hats. I never laughed more than when we hammered Bergen in Europe and their fans starting chanting red shite songs at us!

Winter in Merseyside.

Anything ever shown on ITV on Saturday evenings.

Amen to irritating modern cars.......open the bonnet and.......what the fuck?

Just be honest and admit you don't have a special source and you're just quoting from that twitter.

People who use the phrase 'unplayable'.

Those C**TS across the park.

And that pompous tw*t Jeremy Kyle.

"Signing Manuel Fernandes is like todally a no brainer, dude."

"If Lewis Holtby is in the last year of his contract then bidding for him in January is like a todal no brainer."

The Glass Ceiling...i'm doing my best to remain calm here...it's what talentless women suggest exists to prevent them from attaining their God-given right to, for instance, a seat on the board of any multi-national company. There are even plans to introduce a law which will force companies to include a considerable percentage of women on their Board of Directors whether they have the talent or not.
Just remember, for every woman on the board of any company means that an ironing board or kitchen sink remains unattended.....

The result of taking too many Brave Pills prior to a Derby Match.

In general. Volvo drivers, because it's the world's safest car, they're either ultra cautious (y'know you can die in a road accident @ 8mph, so I'm not going to go that fast) or complete maniacs.

Ringing up companies, and being met with- "All our calls are recorded for quality control pyrposes- you now have the follwing options; If your mother is a one-legged bi-sexual Albanian please press 1 now" Grrrrrr

I've got feelings yer know....

Is Pepsi ok?

Cheryl Cole.....national treasure

Americans

As some one has mentioned, fruit on pizza is plain wrong.

I also hate that twat Angus Deeton who has made a living out of being a sarcy unfunny prick.

I think there should be a spike that comes into their finger that makes them wait till the light turns green.

Rob Patterson - be careful about people who say people who make lists using upper case.

Steve Smith - Quite liking is entirely human. Shankley - the RS banned him from their training ground. He never went to Arnoldfield again, came to GP. A man of taste, in the end. I think you got it right.

I don't think I've ever hated a player like the dirty, ugly, cheating, racist Uruguayan shit-bag from over there.

Also:-
(1) Politicians who never answer the question,
(2) every single person on TV wearing a poppy at this time of year when half of them don't have a clue why they're wearing it.
(3) Whinging football managers – just admit your team were fuking crap today so there's no need to blame the ref.
(4) BBC repeating a programme just three weeks after they first showed it — why?
(5) People with company cars who have no idea how hard it is get ya car through an MOT.
(6) Teenagers who have got a mobile permanently welded to their hand as they walk up the street.
(7) Teenagers who have mobiles that are worth more than my car!
(8) Mitt Romney.
(9) Tony "bullshit" Blair
(10) Football “supporters” who can’t name their club's heroes before the birth of the PL.
(11) Anyone who signs off with 'YNWA'